On this upward and sometimes hazardous journey, each of us meets our share of daily challenges. If we are not careful, as we peer through the narrow lens of self-interest, we may feel that life is bringing us more than our fair share of trials—that somehow others seem to be getting off more lightly.

But the tests of life are tailored for our own best interests, and all will face the burdens best suited to their own mortal experience. In the end we will realize that God is merciful as well as just and that all the rules are fair. We can be reassured that our challenges will be the ones we needed, and conquering them will bring blessings we could have received in no other way.

If we constantly focus only on the stones in our mortal path, we will almost surely miss the beautiful flower or cool stream provided by the loving Father who outlined our journey. Each day can bring more joy than sorrow when our mortal and spiritual eyes are open to God’s goodness. Joy in the gospel is not something that begins only in the next life. It is our privilege now, this very day. We must never allow our burdens to obscure our blessings. There will always be more blessings than burdens—even if some days it doesn’t seem so. Jesus said, “I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.”19 Enjoy those blessings right now. They are yours and always will be. 

– Jeffrey R. Holland, “What I Wish Every New Member Knew—and Every Longtime Member Remembered,” Ensign, Oct 2006, 10–16

"Take therefore no thought for the morrow, 

for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself.  

Sufficient is the day..."

3 Nephi 13:34

"The rewards of parenting come from being attentive to our children's feelings.  It is impossible to accept and validate a child's emotion at the same time you wish it would just go away.  Acceptance and validation come instead from epathy--that is, feeling what your child is feeling in the moment...

...Once you dedicate yourself to being present with your child's emotions, you will find opportunities to connect with her in meaningful ways on a day-to-day basis.  From a series of seemingly mundane incidents, you'll form an important, lasting bond.  You'll become...'a collector of moments.'  You'll recognize your interactions as precious opportunities and value aspects that others might miss.  And when you look back, you'll see your relationship with your child as you would a treasured string of pearls."

-John Gottman, "Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child"

It’s what you do that counts, not how you feel.

- Jeffrey Schwartz in “Brain Lock”

If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself.  What isn't part of ourselves doesn't disturb us.
  - Hermann Hesse

Ch. 24 Leading in the Lord's Way

This is from our lesson in Relief Society yesterday.  I feel like a lot of what I read or hear gets applied to motherhood and being a parent.   The lesson was focused on qualities of a good leader, some of which are:

Integrity Open-minded Obedient Loyalty

Humble Patience Perseverance Fair

Friendly Supportive Sacrifice Love

Good worker Reliable Service Caring

Delegate Organized Put others first Lead by example

These can really be applied to our interaction with anyone and everyone around us.

 Another amazing quote is by Joseph Smith: 

“Teach them correct principles, and they govern themselves.”  

I have thought about this before and reminded me again of how we cannot force someone to behave the way we want them, no matter how much we know it will benefit them.  I felt this way on my mission and now as a parent.  The ability to choose is an amazing blessing that has been given to us because of the plan that was carried out by our Savior.  We can only teach the things we know to be good and right, but then we have to step back and give the other the chance to exercise his agency.  In a way it takes greater love to do that than to force and dominate.  

"It is said that in Chinese the ideogram representing 'opportunity' is encompassed in the ideogram for 'crisis.'  Nowhere is the linking of these two concepts more apt than in our role as parents. . . negative experiences can serve as superb opportunities to empathize, to build intimacy with our children, and to teach them ways to handle their feelings.  

For many parents, recognizing children's negative emotions as opportunities for such bonding and teaching comes as a relief, a liberation, a great 'ah-ha.'  We can look at our children's anger as something other than a challenge to our authority. "

Expert from "Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child" by John Gottman

I have yet to find the man,

however exalted his station,

who did no do better work

and put forth greater effort

under a spirit of approval

than under a spirit of criticism.

–Charles Schwab

"A cheerful look sends an uplifting message that says, 'Whether I feel it or not, there is something to smile about.  There is something in our lives for which we can be glad!' "

--Karol Ladd from "The Power of a Positive Mom"

“And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness.  I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.” 

 Ether 12:27

"Life is difficult. This is a great truth, one of the greatest truths. It is a great truth because once we truly see this truth, we transcend it. Once we truly know that life is difficult - once we truly understand and accept it - then life is no longer difficult. Because once it is accepted, the fact that life is difficult no longer matters."

- M. Scott Peck in “The Road Less Travelled”

 

If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams

and endeavors to love the life which he has imagined,

he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.

–Henry David Thoreau